Whats going to make the most money this weekend?
The super bowl of course.
Which is why you have three not-so-entertaining-looking films opening wide today. Heres three reasons to watch the super bowl on Sunday, and pregame shows on Friday and Saturday:
I already saw this movie.... two years ago.... when it was the original from Japan. And quite frankly, this just won't cut it.
The original is a very good movie with some scary moments and a nice ending. I can only imagine what the Jessica Alba version will be like.
Lets not lie to ourselves, Alba is probably the most beautiful woman in hollywood, but can she carry a movie? She certainly couldn't carry Awake, one of the worst films of 2007. Or Good Luck Chuck, which most critics put on their bottom ten lists of 07.
As a matter of fact, what good movies has she been in?
Sin City of course, but her role was so minor, how could she screw it up?
I'm not saying these failures are all her fault, but shes so good looking that she can't help it. A producer will take any script given to him and make it for 50 million bucks at least if he knows Alba is ready to star.
Worst of all for Alba and The Eye is that the movie has already been made, and probably made much better, so there is now a standard they have to live up to that it will be judged against and more than likely it will fail miserably.
Will I see it?
OF COURSE! Just not in the theater.
I'll see it: First week on DVD
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Take a few funny actors and give them a mediocre script and hope it all comes together with a small budget. Happens all the time, fails 95 percent of the time.
I don't expect anything less here.
Steve Zahn is sick of being the funny sidekick I guess, so he's given that role to Jonah Hill. Won't matter for Zahn though because Hill is already funnier. Except that coming off of Superbad, the funniest movie of 2007, Hill has been given high expectations but has he been given a good script or the freedom to improvise?
Heres what you need to know about the writing credits for Strange Wilderness writer/director Fred Wolf:
Without a Paddle
Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star
Joe Dirt
Dirty Work
Black Sheep
Can you see a pattern in that list? Maybe that each movie is shittier than the previous one.
From a very good start with Black Sheep (how could he fail with Farley and Spade?) to Without a Paddle, which already seemed like the prequel to this movie before I ever saw the writing credits for Wolf.
I'd be about as excited to see this script was written by DICK Wolf (Law & Order.... Come on people. Its funny.)
I'll see it: Five weeks after its out on DVD
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Since when is Eva Longoria (screw the Parker) a movie star? She's been in what, The Sentinal?Sorry Flight Attendant #3 on Beverly Hills 90210 (her first credit) but you aren't ready to carry a movie.
And this certainly doesn't look like a movie you want to get your start with. Im not an agent or anything, but how about a romantic comedy starring Matthew McConaughy? Or a low budge horror? You can't just go from Desperate Housewife to movie star. As a matter of fact, it usually goes the opposite direction.
And I am so dissappointed in you Paul Rudd. We had such high hopes, lets just forget the whole thing, okay?
I'll see it: NEVER!





